How to overcome Negative Beliefs that are Keeping you Stuck

We all suffer from unhelpful, negative beliefs but, some of us suffer more than is necessary.  Have you ever been in a situation where you had to make a life-changing decision and was faced with two choices: a bad choice which seemed like the attractive easy option and the best choice that looked tough to swallow. It might not be a life-altering situation in the sense of the heavens opening or life and death stuff – but you’d be amazed at how even the smallest choices that we make can have a knock on effect on the overall path we take.

In psychology, namely Cognitive Behavioural therapy (CBT) there is an argument that your thoughts will dictate your footsteps.  This ties in with Biblical truth, as Yeshua taught us the importance of our beliefs in co-creating our reality and then there is the favourite quote of Christian who favour CBT:

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. (Romans 12:2, ESV)

I have seen this truth in my own everyday experiences, the lies that we tell ourselves can easily become reality if and when we let them take root in our actions. So I’m really excited to start my Advanced practice Diploma in CBT shortly! (Continue reading)

How to overcome Negative Beliefs that are Keeping you Stuck

 

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The Give and Take of Mutual Relationships

Humans can be very self-centred, this is really highlighted within relationships whether with man or God. Yet relationships are or should be about reciprocity, mutual benefit or put another way give and take.

give and takeWe are OK when it comes to taking but not so much when it comes to giving. We find it much more easy to receive and very difficult to release.

I see this a lot in the online world, people are used to taking. There are free offers everywhere and we collect and hoard them, store them away but they hardly see the light of day if at all. They are like trophies or tools that we collect just in case we need them.

But when does taking stop being taking and start to become stealing (taking more than what was given/intended)? Continue reading The Give and Take of Mutual Relationships

Struck down, but not destroyed (part 1)

What does it mean to be ‘un’destroyed? 

Well, when I thought about how to describe or define this term the following scripture popped up in my head which I think aptly explains what I mean.

We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed;

(2 Corinthians 4:8-9 ESV)

These verses illustrate pain and courage, the apostles suffered affliction everywhere they turned and I can see this most clearly in the Book of ActsThey were thrown into jail, stoned, beaten, ridiculed and more but this never stopped them from pressing on in their work.  The reality of what they were facing could have distressed them and made them feel like they were being hemmed in but they didn’t allow the suffering they experienced to stifle their zeal.  They couldn’t fully comprehend why they were facing so much tribulation, their experiences left them feeling perplexed but even in the midst of mounting uncertainty they still had hope that there was a way out.  At times it seems that people went out of their way to hound them, shut them up and destroy them but even in the midst of this God never left them to the whims of their enemies, He never gave them up to destruction. Continue reading Struck down, but not destroyed (part 1)

Another look at psalm 119

I love the psalms but I have always shied away from psalm 119, maybe it was its length or all those references to testimonies, precepts and instructions, but on Wednesday I was given homework to read it.  So on Thursday during my prayer time, I read the first 25 verses, not so bad, then Friday I read the whole thing through.  Why?

There was something about the intensity of the words that gripped me, I could feel the juxtaposition of faith and love struggle alongside fear and torment, and I could see myself in those lines.  I have uttered these words before, I have felt this way, I am here.

Before I was afflicted I went astray: but now have I kept thy word.
It is good for me that I have been afflicted; that I might learn thy statutes.

Verse 67 & 71

Sometimes the only time when we truly seek God is during and after affliction, affliction may be a form of God’s judgement, a consequence of our own behaviour.  From this judgement we learn just how mighty and awesome God is and realise that there is truly none like Him, our desire becomes to learn more about this awesome God and walk in His ways.

81-83My soul fainteth for thy salvation: but I hope in thy word.
Mine eyes fail for thy word, saying, When wilt thou comfort me?
For I am become like a bottle in the smoke; yet do I not forget thy statutes.

Sometimes the pain of waiting is next to torturous, the only thing we can do is to diligently seek for and hope in His Word to comfort and redeem us.  We faint but yet His Spirit keeps us in the journey.

92-93 Unless thy law had been my delights, I should then have perished in mine affliction.  I will never forget thy precepts: for with them thou hast quickened me.

Every other line seems to be a heartfelt plea for help, then praise and then a deeper seeking of the Word of God.  These are our 3 weapons that we should use in good and bad:

  1. Prayer from an upright heart
  2. Praise, worship and thanksgiving
  3. Reading the Word and meditating on His law

God has promised to deliver us and rescue us, our situation is not forever.  I will have heart and hope in the Lord of Heaven and Earth.

 

On nurturing and growing the fruit of Love

I’m sitting here typing knowing that I need to say something but not quite sure what it will be, but I know that it will be on love.  Why love?  Because God has been dealing with me in this area, and I’m both saddened and perplexed by what He has unveiled in me.  I’ve always been known for having a kind heart but deep down inside I guess I was always kind, loving and giving on my own terms, when it suited me best.  I could go out of my way to help someone but not if it encroached past my well-fortified four walls, physically and spiritually. 

Yesterday was a case in point, I had designated it as my rest day because I was worn out from having to look after my husband who has been ill for around a month, cooking, cleaning, ministry work and dealing with my own health and well-being problems.  In the midst of all of this, the thing that had suffered the most was my quality time with my Father (Abba) so I made a silent vow the night before to spend the day with Him, just He and I.  I had so many plans about how I would spend this ‘us’ time, I would read, write, pray, sing, dance and anything else I was moved to do… it didn’t end up that way.  A major issue for hubby and I is that we live in shared accommodation, so we have one room for personal use, this doesn’t really matter when he’s at work but with him at home it does really matter.  So while I was trying to carve out some spiritual rest time, Eke was talking to me or reading out loud, fair enough I know that I didn’t tell him that it was my ‘rest’ day but I could feel myself becoming more and more agitated and frustrated as the day wore on.  So I went downstairs as everyone else was out and decided to sit in the front room then my husband told me that one of his young mentees was coming round grrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!  This would mean that I would have to forfeit all of my plans and put on my social face instead, now how do I dig myself out of these feelings of anger and frustration and wrap myself back in God’s cloak of love and warmth? Continue reading On nurturing and growing the fruit of Love

Confessions of a Shopaholic

I don’t think I have ever come across one person who has not suffered with some form of inclination to idolatry, yes, even amongst Christians!  Idolatry, does not have to be overt worship of images but things that we turn to when the going gets tough in order to escape our everyday cares, or those things which we can’t live without or must do in order to make it through the day or feel better about ourselves.  I see  a propensity for false-worship in myself in the need to find comfort in various things instead of turning to God for comfort, whether it’s TV addiction, losing myself in a ‘good read‘ or comfort-eating whenever I turn to these things over going to God for help I have created an idol for myself.

woman holding shopping bags

It is this truth that first made me think about what I shall write below, even though shopping is not my particular achilles heel, I know that many, many people comfort-shop but is it more than an idle past-time?  I have tried to capture what I think goes through the mind of someone who shops compulsively, but I think this can be applied to anything that we do that we are drawn uncontrollably to.  As I wrote this I thought of my own struggles and temptations and those of someone I know personally who experiences this particular struggle on a day-to-day basis.

God Bless

Continue reading Confessions of a Shopaholic

(sticky post)!!!The first day of my new life…?

When I told my husband Eke on Monday that it was the first day of my new life, his eyebrow rose as if to say “really, again?” and I was quick to explain that although I had other ‘first days’, that this day marked the first day of this era of my life just like the others had marked the entrance of transition in times past.  Monday the 25th of July 2011 was different because I woke up with the sensation that something fantastic was about to happen in my life based on God’s revelation and my acceptance that I am His own vessel, set aside for good works!  There seemed to be an extra brightness about the day, an increased clarity that made me feel alive in the Holy Spirit; I knew on that day, that was the day that I would write my affirmation.

What is an affirmation?  I hear you say.  Continue reading (sticky post)!!!The first day of my new life…?